Such Great Heights

 Page 1518

HELLOOOOO.

Been a while huh.

I've just been getting lazier. 

Literally spent the rest of the day lazing away after work today.

Whatever, it's the weekends.

Caught this movie called 'Garden State' (2004).

It's always been on my watchlist since I watched a video of Frou Frou's song 'Let Go' during my Secondary School Days.

Man, this movie really got to me.

It's about a troubled actor that that came back after a decade to attend his mother's funeral.

He went on this healing journey to sort of 'find himself' throughout the movie and confronted past issues such as his overbearing father. That was.. a lot. All this while battling through his mental health issues.

As dark as it was, it had lighter tones to it as he came across a quirky girl whom he fell in love with. They're moments together were so sweet. 

With them embracing and her asking; ''How are you feeling?'

And he responds 'Safe. When I'm with you, I feel so safe. Like I'm home.' 

This movie gave me a lot of feels for some reason. It was nostalgic, and had a few comedic moments too. Haha. I'm glad I finally got to watch it.

Have a good weekend. x

Love, Eran.

Current Song Mood: Iron & Wine - Such Great Heights

I am thinking it's a sign
That the freckles in our eyes
Are mirror images and when we kiss
They're perfectly aligned

And I have to speculate
That God himself did make us
Into corresponding shapes
Like puzzle pieces from the clay

And true it may seem like a stretch
But it's thoughts like this that catch
My troubled head when you're away
When I am missing you to death

When you are out there on the road
For several weeks of shows
And when you scan the radio
I hope this song will guide you home

They will see us waving from such great heights
Come down now, they'll say
But everything looks perfect from far away
Come down now but we'll stay

I've tried my best to leave
This all on your machine
But the persistent beat
It sounded thin upon listening

And that frankly will not fly
You'll hear the shrillest highs
And lowest lows with the windows down
When this is guiding you home

They will see us waving from such great heights
Come down now, they'll say
But everything looks perfect from far away
Come down now but we'll stay

Come Through

 Page 1517

Not sure how I got through work today.

I wasn't myself and so distracted.

Pondering on whether my feelings were valid.

And just feeling so..

Vulnerable.

Still managed to come through.

For my own sake.

I had to.

I hate working with a heavy heart and a pitting feeling in my gut.

It truly sucks.

Talking it out makes me feel so much better.

When I usually keep this in my head.

I'm so.. used to that.

Ok, no more getting worked up.

It's time for the weekends.

Love, Eran.

Current Song Mood: H.E.R. Ft Chris Brown - Come Through

Almost missed my flight today
I look good even though I feel shitty
I just got back out this way
You already got plans for the city
Call 'em off, could you call 'em off for me?
You're always going on and on
Got it all, ask me why I'll never leave
I don't go out much

But you should come through tonight
I'm chilling on the Westside, boo
Call my homegirl, tell your best friend he could slide too
On the low, a remote location
I don't want them seein' me getting faded
You should come through tonight
I only kick it with a tight crew
They won't tell 'cause they tryna live they best life too
On the low on my own, I'll be wavy
Hit me on my phone, I'll be waiting
Yeah yeah

Looking at you cry, going crazy
If I could, I would take the pain away
I don't see that smile I made
You already made plans that ain't with me
Trying hard, I been trying hard to breathe
Inhale, exhale, you expel what you been doing to me
Fighting it off, you been fighting me off for weeks
Don't leave, 'cause I need ya

But you should come through tonight
I'm chilling on the Westside, boo
Call my homegirl, tell your best friend he could slide too
On the low, a remote location
I don't want them seein' me getting faded
You should come through tonight
I only kick it with a tight crew
They won't tell 'cause they tryna live they best life too
On the low on my own, I'll be wavy
Hit me on my phone, I'll be waiting
Yeah yeah

I ain't really tryna spend no time
In the house, if you ask me how I'm feeling
I said yes to going out tonight
Oh I ain't did that in a minute
Called it off, oh, I called it off for you
You're always going on and on
Ask me why, oh, why I'm not with you
I don't go out much

But you should come through tonight
I'm chilling on the Westside, boo
Call my homegirl, tell your best friend he could slide too
On the low, a remote location
I don't want them seein' me getting faded
You should come through tonight
I only kick it with a tight crew
They won't tell 'cause they tryna live they best life too
On the low on my own, I'll be wavy
Hit me on my phone, I'll be waiting
Yeah yeah

Faded, uh
Hit me on my phone, I'll be waiting, waiting
Yeah yeah yeah, uh
Hit me on my phone, hit me on my phone, yeah
Ooh, I'll be waiting, yeah
Hitting me, alone, oh yeah yeah
Give me a call, oh yeah yeah
Give me a call, yeah

My Own

 Page 1516

Do I have the right?

To be feeling whatever I'm feeling right now?

Am I allowed to? 

Because I feel selfish. I feel wrong. Why do I feel this way?

Because you don't feel good. - You haven't been for some time.

Do I give in? I do right? Because it's the right thing. 

Right?

It's because I've planned it in advanced. 

It's because I hate when things don't work out the way I've planned in my head.

Like how I was looking forward to it the whole day.

Prepared for it.

Because I wanted to do it with you.

Because I can't see you tomorrow.

Took the effort to plan. Friday night instead of Saturday because I know that you're working out Sunday morning.

I drank coffee cause I was prepared to stay up.

These little things yet. I feel like I'm the petty one. Maybe I am.

Why?

Just.

Why is it that I always have to be the bigger person?

To give in and say it's okay.

'It's fine.'

When really, it's not.

I really don't have anyone to talk this out to.

I don't think I want to.

Because it's really not a big deal.

Honest.

But it's the little things that seem to hurt the most.

Or maybe I'm just an emotional wreck right now.

Just.. trying to hold my own.

Love, Eran.

Current Song Mood: H.E.R. - My Own

Said I been away too long
Every time I hear that song
I don't wanna hear it no more
Baby I can't take no more from you
I don't wanna play no more
Don't be going back and forth on me
I be already on call
Even when I know it's wrong for me

Something
Don't know but it's something
I don't wanna work for something knowing it ain't worth it, no
Coming
You knew it was coming
You should know that I don't act like that without a purpose, no

Call me crazy baby, you just bring outta me
I'm tryna do better, but you ain't been helping me
Baby I can't help it, you know how to get to me
I, I...

I been tryna hold my own
My own, my own
Oh baby on my own
My own, my own
Ooh...

Don't mind me, cuz it ain't bout you
We both need space, and that's all so true
Know it's okay, if you can't come through
I'm saving your place, and it's all for you

We been waiting too long
I be tryna keep calm
Either way we both wrong
I been waiting on a call
Ooh I really wanna call you
I been tryna be strong
You're the only I wanna talk to

Ah yeah, you just know me better
And it just gets better
Just let me undress ya
On you, on you...
I just love to feel it
When you go inside it
And I get excited
Ooh...
You...
You...

Baby, you keep showing out
But I just can't slow it down
Cuz I just want you right now
With me now
Don't you keep on holding out
Giving me the run around
Are you just noticing now

I'm on my own
My own, my own
Ooh baby, on my own
My own, my own
I been tryna hold my own
My own, my own
I'm just tryna hold my own
My own, my own
Yeah...

Celebrate

Page 1515

WHEEEEEW what a fun weekend it's been.

To celebrate life and some time off of work.

Was supposed to be on leave for a week but it was cut short.

But hey, I'll take what I get.

Did a lot with my partner over the weekend.

A staycation (who needs a hotel???), Loads of coffee & foooooood, and movies :)

Seriously, the coffee we had this week has been on point hahaha.

I mean look at that.

So insta-worthy. And it tasted as good as it looked!

The weather has been amazing too. Reminded me of how gloomy Melbourne 2 years ago. We were reminiscing so much.

We finally caught 'A Quiet Place 2'. The movie blew us away as usual. I hope this franchise expands as much as it can. Seriously, not for the faint-hearted. 5/5!!!!

Mini photo sesh haha. Despite the rain.

Haven't had this much fun in a while. :)

So thankful. So grateful.

Until next time. x

Love, Eran.

Current Song Mood: Isaac Dunbar - Celebrate 

Get your head up out of bed and put on your coat
It's easier said than done
If I could do it, you can do it
You'll never know, you're in your head (Here's my love)
You can blame it on the memories that ruin your day
Blame it on your bad luck and stay the same
Or maybe you could break the curse
You never know but I know

Those good days are somethin' you choose
You don't have to fight, fight, you got nothin' to lose
So let go of all the weight
And let's celebrate the pain, yeah

Celebrate with me, today, tomorrow, and yesterday (Yesterday)
Celebrate all your pain to me
Celebrate all your pain to me
Celebrate with me, forever, never and for only a day (Only a day)
Celebrate all your pain to me
Celebrate all your pain to me

On and on and on, the days they blend
I lost myself (I lost my friends)
I marinated in the hate and hated the love
Alone I stayed (Where's my head?)

Those good days are somethin' you choose
You don't have to fight, fight, you got nothin' to lose
So let go of all the weight
And let's celebrate the pain, yeah

Celebrate with me, today, tomorrow, and yesterday (Yesterday)
Celebrate all your pain to me
Celebrate all your pain to me
Celebrate with me, forever, never and for only a day (Only a day)
Celebrate all your pain to me
Celebrate all your pain to me

Accept the love
It's right in front of your face
Oh, what are you waiting for?
It's right in front of your face
Oh, accept the love
It's right in front of your face
Oh, and celebrate all your pain to me
Celebrate all your pain to me

Maybe you need some time
Maybe you need some space
Or maybe you need
To ce-ce-celebarate

Celebrate with me, today, tomorrow, and yesterday (Yesterday)
Celebrate all your pain to me
Celebrate all your pain to me
Celebrate with me, forever, never and for only a day (Only a day)
Celebrate all your pain to me
Celebrate all your pain to me

Accept the love
It's right in front of your face
Oh, what are you waiting for?
It's right in front of your face
Oh, accept the love
It's right in front of your face
Oh, and celebrate all your pain to me
Celebrate all your pain to me