Imaginary friend

Page 640

Lately, I've been enjoying time on my own.

No expectations.

No one to think about.

Just Me. Myself. & I.

Such a loner I am.

Haha well.

I've always grown up such an introvert.

I keep to myself a lot.

Not healthy, yes. But I have my ways to cope

I even had an imaginary friend, as a kid.

A soft toy I keep. A rabbit.

Someone I still hold on to, till this very day, keeping him near to me when I sleep at night.

I started opening up more in Poly, and even more now in NS.

I'm not that timid little kid anymore.

But I still fall back to my introvert ways at times.

It's my safe zone.

Being alone, recharges me.

I feel that it's better off this way.

Yeah.

Love, Eran.

Stay with me till the end.

Current Song Mood: Tove Lo - Imaginary Friend

People said you're not a superstar
Can't jump that far
You know better
Got my arm around with superglue
Come power through
Yeah, whatever

Crushing my heart, tear me apart
Hate on this world 'cause reality sucks
Feeling their doubt, shut them all out
Crushing my heart, tear me apart
Hate on this world 'cause reality sucks
Feeling their doubt, shut them all out
'Cause I need you

Imaginary friend, stay with me 'til the end now
Keeping me dreaming
Imaginary friend, stay with me 'til the end now
Over, over again
(Don't you know I)
Keeping me dreaming
(Don't you know I)
Over, over again
(Don't you know I)

Breaking bones to feel like I'm alive
How kids get high
Need a feeling
We want big things, but they make us small
No game at all
They don't feel it

Crushing my heart, tear me apart
Hate on this world 'cause reality sucks
Feeling their doubt, shut them all out
Crushing my heart, tear me apart
Hate on this world 'cause reality sucks
Feeling their doubt, shut them all out
'Cause I need you

Imaginary friend, stay with me 'til the end now
Keeping me dreaming
Imaginary friend, stay with me 'til the end now
Over, over again
(Don't you know I)
Keeping me dreaming
(Don't you know I)
Over, over again
(Don't you know I)

Crushing my heart, tear me apart
Hate on this world 'cause reality sucks
Crushing my heart, tear me apart
Feeling their doubt, shut them all out
Over, over again

(Don't you know I)
Keeping me dreaming
(Don't you know I)
Over, over again
(Don't you know I)
Imaginary friend, stay with me 'til the end now
Keeping me dreaming
Imaginary friend, stay with me 'til the end now
Over, over again
(Don't you know I)

I don't know, I guess it's kinda like a voice in my heart
Reminding me that there's nothing to fear in the things I'm afraid of

Lady Wood

Page 639

Time and time again,

I meet individuals that change my outlook in life.

Making me appreciate mine greatly.

My heart felt for you tonight.

And all that you've been through.

You gave me lady wood.

And I really enjoyed it.

Our time together.

Thank you.

xx

Love, Eran.

Current Song Mood: Tove Lo - Lady Wood

Nothing but a dirty mind

Player burning bridges where she goes

Looking like the freak card kind

But no one standin' around him wants him close

Ooh, wh-why

Ooh, wh-why

White noise in my head, ego

Ooh, wh-why

Ooh, wh-why

Judge a babe who dance alone

I know what people say about you

They say the same about me

I don't care if it's all true

I want you hanging with me

I want you, I want you hanging with me

I want you, I want you hanging with me

Rumors are their only friends

Spread that shit around's what turns them on

I can see all eyes expand

Oh, they can't believe I take you home

Ooh, wh-why

Ooh, wh-why

White noise in my head, ego

Ooh, wh-why

Ooh, wh-why

Judge a babe who dance alone

I know what people say about you

They say the same about me

And I don't care if it's all true

I want you hanging with me

I want you, I want you hanging with me

I want you, I want you hanging with me

Perfect imperfections with mistakes and a unlearned lessons

Yeah, you give me wood

Give me lady wood

Dirty on the inside, damaged goods with nothing but pride

Yeah, you give me wood

Give me lady wood

I know what people say about you

They say the same about me

I want you

I know what people say about you

They say the same-

I don't care if it's all true

I want you hanging with me

I want you, I want you hanging with me 

I want you, I want you hanging with me

I don't care if it's all true

I want you, I want you hanging with me

Vibe.

Page 638

Finally survived this week.

Some people just really love killing my vibe.

So much problems created at the last minute.

One day I'm probably just gonna snap.

Sigh.

Ah well at least the weekends are here.

Glad I could hang out with Buddy and Ndrew last night.

Catch-up time was much needed.

The love between us is just <3

Beyond.

Totally helped to de-stress.

Love you guys.

And be strong Buddy.

You'll get through this, I know you can.

Love, Eran.

Current Song Mood: JoJo - Vibe.

I was cool already
Way before you met me
In my Tims and my Happy socks
And I know how to get 'em off
See my skies all sunny
Got a pocket full of money
And maybe there's not a lot
But damn, I'm in a good spot

Got nothing to hide
You're not playing this right
You want some advice?

Boy, don't be killing my
Boy, don't be killing my vibe
My vibe, oh my vibe
Boy, don't be killing my
Boy, don't be killing my vibe
My vibe, my vibe
Boy, don't be killing my
You just might be killing me

Rock your body, rock steady
Love me, baby, I'm so ready
Wanna get lucky tonight
Boy, don't be killing my
Boy, don't be killing my vibe

Pla-player, I'm a real sensei
There's a future in you and me
Upstairs in my balcony
Yeah, got a good buzz going
And it feels good knowing
Got my girls here who got my back
And the guys got to deal with that

Got nothing to hide
You're not playing this right
You want some advice?

Boy, don't be killing my
Boy, don't be killing my vibe
My vibe, oh my vibe
Boy, don't be killing my
Boy, don't be killing my vibe
My vibe, my vibe
Boy, don't be killing my
You just might be killing me

Rock your body, rock steady
Love me, baby, I'm so ready
Wanna get lucky tonight
Boy, don't be killing my
Boy, don't be killing my vibe

I think I wanna what you got
You're the one who's got the shot
And now you don't go blowing it talking about your heart
Don't be so serious
Boy, don't be killing my
Boy, don't be killing my vibe

Rock your body, rock steady
Love me, baby, I'm so ready
Wanna get lucky tonight
Boy, don't be killing my
Boy, don't be killing my vibe
Boy, don't be killing my
You just might be killing me

Rock your body, rock steady
Love me, baby, I'm so ready
Wanna get lucky tonight
Boy, don't be killing my
You just be killing me

Rock your body, rock steady
Love me, baby, I'm so ready
Wanna get lucky tonight
Boy, don't be killing my
Boy, don't be killing my vibe

Body Moves

Page 637

Not sure if it's a sign.

But I'm seeing you around more lately.

Brought me back to the way I felt during Brunei.

Part of me wants to say something.

But I guess I'm just too damn shy to.

And I know you sense it too.

I can feel the tension in the air.

Maybe you know.

Maybe you don't.

But I don't care.

I'm just so attracted.

I guess, its just how your body moves.

Damn.

Love, Eran.

Current Song Mood: DNCE - Body Moves

(Ow!)
(Hey, that's right!)
(Oh!)

Side by side
Walking home, stumbling home, getting curious
What's on your mind?
Cause what's on mine, a dirty mind
Why so serious?

Baby the stars above will light the way
Just take my hand and hear the words I say
Yeah, when the morning comes, I'll always stay
You gotta know, you gotta know that I'm feeling this

Come and roll with me, we'll rock them body moves
Me and you (oh, just a little bit)
Body moves (yeah, just a little bit, ow!)
Come on home with me, oh baby, let it loose
Me and you (oh, just a little bit)
Body moves (yeah, just a little bit)
I don't need it, but you know how bad I want it
And your touch has got me haunted, but I li-I-ike it
Come and roll with me, we'll rock them body moves
Me and you (oh, just a little bit)
Body moves (yeah, just a little bit)

We've got all night
Show me more, a little more, it's getting scandalous
Yeah, all my life, yeah
I'm waiting for, the girl next door to get real dangerous (real dangerous)

Baby the stars above will light the way
Just take my hand and hear the words I say
Yeah, when the morning comes, I'll always stay
You gotta know, you gotta know that I'm feeling this

Come and roll with me, we'll rock them body moves
Me and you (oh, just a little bit)
Body moves (yeah, just a little bit, ow!)
Come on home with me, oh baby, let it loose
Me and you (oh, just a little bit)
Body moves (yeah, just a little bit)
I don't need it, but you know how bad I want it
And your touch has got me haunted, but I li-I-ike it
Come and roll with me, we'll rock them body moves
Me and you (oh, just a little bit)
Body moves (yeah, just a little bit), oh

(Ha, that's right!)
(Go) [x16]

Yeah, when the morning comes, I'll always stay
You gotta know, you gotta know that I'm feeling this

Come and roll with me, we'll rock them body moves
Me and you (oh, just a little bit)
Body moves (yeah, just a little bit, ow!)
Come on home with me, oh baby, let it loose
Me and you (oh, just a little bit)
Body moves (yeah, just a little bit)
I don't need it, but you know how bad I want it
And your touch has got me haunted, but I li-I-ike it
Come and roll with me, we'll rock them body moves
Me and you (oh, just a little bit)
Body moves (yeah, just a little bit)

(Go) [x8]

I Can Only.

Page 636

So tired of all the SHIT people in my life.

I have enough on my plate to deal with.

People who think they can have their way all the time.

Stepping all over my head just cause I'm nice.

F*ck that.

The world doesn't revolve around you.

Think of the others around you.

Put yourselves in my shoes.

I can only do so much.

I can only be who I can be.

I can only smoke what I wanna smoke.

I can only f*ck who I wanna f*ck.

I can only be tolerant, for so many.

Dont hate me.

Love, Eran.

Current Song Mood: JoJo Ft Alessia Cara - I Can Only.

[Jojo:]
I learned the hard way on how to let go
So here we go
Feel the adrenaline takin' control
Get high, no low
This moment of truth hidden under my tongue
No longer numb
Running like rain when I thought it dried up
Can't get enough

I'm climbing up these walls
I'm invincible
Even if I fall
I fall on me
Got myself alive
Up here in the sky
My ecstasy

I can only drink what I wanna drink
I can only say what I wanna say
I can only think what I wanna think
Don't hate me, don't hate
I can only love who I wanna love
I can only smoke what I wanna smoke
I can only fuck who I wanna fuck
Don't hate me, don't hate
I-I I can only, I-I I can only, I-I I can only
Don't hate me, don't hate

[Alessia Cara:]
All that you gettin' is all that you see
I'm cool with it
Nothing else ever made much sense to me
I'm not doing it

I'm climbing up these walls
I'm invincible
Even if I fall
I fall on me
Got myself alive
Up here in the sky
My ecstasy

I can only do what I wanna do
I can only say what I wanna say
I can only think what I wanna think
Don't hate me, don't hate
I can only love who I wanna love
I can only look how I wanna look
I can only be what I wanna be
Don't hate me, don't hate
I-I I can only, I-I I can only, I-I I can only
Don't hate me, don't hate
I-I I can only, I-I I can only, I-I I can only

[Jojo:]
Pour a drink and own it up
Here's a toast, there's only one

I can only drink what I wanna drink
I can only say what I wanna say
I can only think what I wanna think
Don't hate me, don't hate
I can only love who I wanna love
I can only smoke what I wanna smoke
I can only fuck who I wanna fuck
Don't hate me, don't hate
I-I I can only, I-I I can only, I-I I can only
Don't hate me, don't hate
I-I I can only, I-I I can only, I-I I can only

Midnight Decisions

Page 635

I tend to think a lot at night.

Overthink, actually.

That's the time when you're fully awake.

Running through what happened to you in the day.

Looking back to the past.

Planning for your future.

Making midnight decisions.

Maybe rash ones.

And that, needs a change.

Love, Eran.

I always regret them.

Current Song Mood: Sia - Midnight Decisions

Remember when we had it all?
Remember when you took my calls?
You were my whole world
You were my whole world
Not a thing said to me
Question now if my heart bleeds
You were my whole world
You were my whole world

I can't stop watching my phone
Can't turn it off
What is wrong with me? I can't, baby
But if you change your mind then I'll miss it
Now I'm crying alone
Hotel, never much fun
Not when there's nobody to catch your tears
Out here

I know
Last night we made some midnight decisions
Did I mess up? Oh God I hope I didn't
It's all a blur when we talk through the liquor
I always regret midnight decisions
I always regret midnight decisions
I always regret midnight decisions
I always regret midnight decisions
I always regret midnight decisions

Soothe me now, soothe me, old friend
Warm my body, dunk my head
He was my whole world
He was my whole world
Kill the chattering
Keep the voices from screaming
He was my whole world
He was my whole world

I can't stop watching my phone
Can't turn it off
What is wrong with me? I can't, baby
But if you change your mind then I'll miss it
Now I'm crying alone
Hotel, never much fun
Not when there's nobody to catch your tears
Out here

I know, last night we made some midnight decisions
Did I mess up? Oh God I hope I didn't
It's all a blur when we talk through the liquor
I always regret midnight decisions
I always regret midnight decisions
I always regret midnight decisions
I always regret midnight decisions
I always regret midnight decisions

Pull me out, I wanna fall
Fall into the rabbit hole
Just pull me out, the pain is great
The pain of losin' you today
I'm in here bawling, just a friend
Never thought we'd meet again
But here you are, one more, again
You're calling me
You're calling me

I know, last night we made some midnight decisions
Did I mess up? Oh God I hope I didn't
It's all a blur when we talk through the liquor
I always regret midnight decisions
I always regret midnight decisions
I always regret midnight decisions
I always regret midnight decisions
I always regret midnight decisions

Honest.

Page 634

Wow.

You really think, you deserve a reply, after all this time?

After leaving me like that?

You really think,

That you can just creep back into my life just like that?

Like nothing happened?

What the fuck?

Who the fuck do you think you are?

Well ok, I'm gonna be honest.

Just like I was during the period I was with you.

Just like the long final message that I left you with before enlisting.

Which I know you didnt even bother reading and deleted anyway.

Yeah, I know, you're still looking me up.

I know you've been finding other young victims.

I've spoken to some of them.

And it's fucking disgusting.

YOU, are fucking disgusting.

Apparently that's a thing right?

Your thing.

Gross.

You think you're the shit?

Well you ARE.

I didn't spread shit about you. Lol.

I only warned others of the truth, to spare them the trouble.

To save them.

The fact that you took the effort to drop me a text shows a lot.

Aww, did I hurt your pride & ego?

I honestly have no time to entertain this.

I'm not the one to hang other's dirty laundry.

I have better, more important things to worry about.

If you want a conversation with me, then come meet me face to face.

But I know you won't have the BALLS to cause thats just the coward that you are.

Hah, 

I'm not just another one of your pretty 'boys'.

At least I've always been honest.

And you, you're still the compulsive liar that you've always been.

Piss off.

Love, Eran.

Current Song Mood: JoJo - Honest.

Trees lose their leaves to the snow
Words cut like ice as you go
No amount of covers could keep me warm
And I've been freezing since the day you walked away

All you ever wanted was a free ride
All I ever wanted was your love
You gave it all away to start a new life
I guess what I could give wasn't enough

You left me cold, cold, cold
You left me cold, cold, cold
You left me cold, cold, cold
You left me cold, cold, cold
You left me

Away...
Away...

Why do we have to call it the nice shift?
Why do we have to hide all of our vices?
You just don't like it when I'm just open
I'm not crazy, this isn't a crisis

I'm just tryna figure out if I'm in love
It's not promiscuous, it's just owning it
You need to let go of what a good girl does
It's not that obvious, it's my prerogative

It might not be what you wanted
But at least I'm honest
But at least I'm honest
It might not be how you thought it
But I'm not that heartless
At least I'm honest
It might not be what you wanted
But at least I'm honest
At least I'm honest
It might not be what you wanted
But at least I'm honest
At least I'm honest

You wanna call me names
When I do what I do but you're doing the fuckin' same
So don't look at me that way, like you thought I was a saint
If I tell you the truth then there's nothing else to explain

I'm just tryna figure out if I'm in love
It's not promiscuous, it's just owning it
You need to let go of what a good girl does
It's not that obvious, it's my prerogative

It might not be what you wanted
But at least I'm honest
But at least I'm honest
It might not be how you thought it
But I'm not that heartless
At least I'm honest
It might not be what you wanted
But at least I'm honest
At least I'm honest
It might not be what you wanted
But at least I'm honest
At least I'm honest

Away...
Away...
Away...
Away...

Don't want you to be disheartened
Tryna do the right thing
Tell you the truth of how I'm feelin'
That's gotta mean somethin'

It might not be what you wanted
But at least I'm honest
But at least I'm honest
It might not be how you thought it
But I'm not that heartless
At least I'm honest
It might not be what you wanted
(It might not be what you wanted)
But at least I'm honest
(But at least I'm always honest)
But at least I'm honest
It might not be what you wanted
(It might not be what you wanted)
But at least I'm honest
(But at least I'm always honest)
But at least I'm honest

Away...
Away...

Edibles.

Page 633

It was like a movie.

You were so dreamy.

So edible.

As you walked past, a sudden aura of coolness in the air.

Your perfectly flawless skin.

Long silky hair.

A mix of perfection.

I was in awe.

Jealous, even.

How could someone look so.. perfect?

We took the same transport back.

And I couldnt help but to steal glances.

Damn.

A full time lover like that.

What I'd do to have that.

I looked away in the distance.

As my mind played with the details.

Love, Eran.

Current Song Mood: JoJo - Edibles.

Never leave this bed alone like eclipse
Don't know what that means but I sure feel it
Everything has been heightened by your service
And I deserve it
I bring all the realness to the surface
Does a woman like that make you nervous?
I'll take you to church and watch you worship
Watch you work it

One by one we'll be switching it up
Like it's everlast
Cause when on two, when the skies turning blue
When we finally crash

No, I don't care where we're standing
I don't want one night stands
Oh, full time lovers
Listen, I got enough feelings in me
Tell me "no matter what happens
We're full time lovers"
If you wanna come eat edibles
Do some freaky shit incredible
I'm your girl, I'm your girl
Listen, I got enough feelings in me
Tell me "no matter what happens
We're full time lovers"

Damn, you've got my foot prints on the ceiling
On the mirror, on the headboard, in the bathroom
On the marble floor
Just somebody cookie got you leaning
Got you feening

One by one we'll be switching it up
Like it's everlast
Cause when on two, when the skies turning blue
When we finally crash

No, I don't care where we're standing
I don't want one night stands
Oh, full time lovers
Listen, I got enough feelings in me
Tell me "no matter what happens
We're full time lovers"
If you wanna come eat edibles
Do some freaky shit incredible
I'm your girl, I'm your girl
Listen, I got enough feelings in me
Tell me "no matter what happens
We're full time lovers"

Green candies melting us together
I feel higher up the fieldway park
Is it your fingers giving tingles or this
Hide your body [?]
Baby, meet me in the dark
I need you here 10 p.m sharp
Yeah, yeah

No, I don't care where we're standing
I don't want one night stands
Oh, full time lovers
Listen, I got enough feelings in me
Tell me "no matter what happens
We're full time lovers"
If you wanna come eat edibles
Do some freaky shit incredible
I'm your girl, I'm your girl
Listen, I got enough feelings in me
Tell me "no matter what happens
We're full time lovers"

Now that you know, baby