Honest

 Page 1427

Sorry if I am not myself these days.

It's been a rough time for my mental health.

I cant seem to sleep properly these days.

And I am having PTSD triggers now and then.

I'll daze out, imagining the worst. 

Because I'm scared.

Of things that might happen.

I am.. paranoid. 

To be honest.

At this point, I am afraid to wake up to dead bodies.

That is how paranoid I am.

Thank you for letting me get away for a while.

I know you tried your best.

I really appreciate it. 

Time passed really fast.

Thank you for letting me be honest.

It is not easy for me, to talk about my problems.

But I love you, so so much. 

Just for listening.

Love, Eran.

Current Song Mood: Rei Brown - Honest 

[Verse 1]

I've been laying wide awake

I have something I have to say

I look at your face, and

I'm ready to cave in

No one I'm waiting

I'm driving the blade in

There's no easier way to explain

Make it all go away

I am to blame

I ain't ever, I ain't ever

[Chorus]

I ain't ever loved you if we're honest, honest

I ain't ever settled what we promised, promised

Thought you could be the one I wanted

But you're so far, far

[Verse 2]

You're not like me, you're too good

Still you want me, I knew you would

I thought it was love, cause

I was hooked like a drug, and

If that's not enough, yeah

I'm calling my bluff, no

I knew you would want me to stay

No, I'm walking away

Don't you wait

I ain't ever, I ain't ever

I ain't ever loved you if we're honest, honest

I ain't ever settled what we promised, promised

Thought you could be the one I wanted

But you're so far, far

[Chorus]

I ain't ever loved you if we're honest, honest

I ain't ever settled what we promised, promised

Thought you could be the one I wanted

But you're so far, far

Honest

Page 1319

It's been quite an emotionally and physically draining week.

But I'm glad.. we made it.

We made through it.

If anything, it made me appreciate everything even more.

Us.

Everything we have.

I realised how.. my life would be so empty without you.

Thank you for sticking by my side.

And fighting for me.

I will always fight for you, too.

You are everything to me.

And I really mean it.

Like a close friend of my said once;

There is really no such thing as a perfect relationship.

It's how you tolerate each other, love them for who they are and work with each other to overcome problems.

It's a reciprocal commitment.

The most important thing is to have; an open communication.

Acknowledging and fixing mistakes.

Learning from it.

And being.. honest.

Something that I am working on.

I wish to be a better person, a better partner.

For you.

:)

For now, I'm just glad to be in your arms again.

And be the affectionate lazy cats that we are.

Love, Eran.

Current Song Mood: San Holo Ft Broods - Honest

How can I try to keep it hidden
When I'm feeling like you're reading my mind?
High and I don't know what I'm thinking
But I'm talking to you like I can't lie

'Cause I don't know you
You don't know me
But I wanna go anywhere you're gonna be, oh
I just want us to be honest
Even if nothing comes from it, no
Come with me
Something so true in the ways that we speak, oh
I just want us to be honest
I just want us to be honest

I just want us to be honest
I just want us to be honest

I just want us to be honest
I just want us to be honest

I love how I hear it in your silence
There's no need for you to say it out loud
Closer now, nothing in between us
Let's keep everything between us, no doubt

And I am never this person
Never this certain
But you got me willing to try
Willing to try
I wanna try

'Cause I don't know you
You don't know me
But I wanna go anywhere you're gonna be, oh
I just want us to be honest
Even if nothing comes from it, no
Come with me
Something so true in the ways that we speak, oh
I just want us to be honest
I just want us to be honest

I just want us to be honest
I just want us to be honest
I just want us to be honest
I just want us to be honest

I just want us to be honest
I just want us to be honest
I just want us to be honest
I just want us to be honest

I just want us to be honest
I just want us to be honest

I just want us to be honest
I just want us to be honest