Hand of God

Page 1150

My heart is so full tonight.

Even though there were so many plans that were... unexpectedly cancelled.

Maybe it was meant to be.

I found new ones that were so enriching.

Met so many passionate souls in one house. 

And I couldnt be happier.

If theres one thing that I learnt from my experiences this year...

Is that everything... happens for a reason.

Its all fated.

The people you come across. That does good or bad to you. That inspires you.

It makes you who you are. And creates a path in your life.

And I'm so thankful, for everyone that I've met this year.

It comes... full circle.

All in the Hand of God.

And I can't be more blessed than tonight. 

To see all these talented individuals perform.

It makes me want to do so much more. 

And I hope I will.

I live and breathe music.

And I envision so much this coming year..

Happy New Year.

And may 2019 be your best.

xx

Love, Eran.

Current Song Mood: Jon Bellion - Hand Of God

[Verse 1 - Jon Bellion:]
My head spins and I've been sipping
I've been sipping, I've been sipping lately
All my sins, I've been tripping, I've been tripping, my God
Brand new life, I've been looking
I've been looking, I've been looking lately
All these nights, they've been cooking
They've been cooking me raw

[Pre-Chorus - Jon Bellion:]
I am just a man, I am just a man
Who lusts, gives, tries 
Sometimes I lose my way

[Chorus - Jon Bellion:]
Tears at a funeral, tears at a funeral, I might break
Angry at all the things, angry at all the things I can't change
When you're lost in the universe, lost in the universe
Don't lose faith
My mother says, "Your whole life's in the hand of God"

[Post-Chorus - Jon Bellion:]
Break it down
Your whole life's in the hand of
Your whole life's in the hand of God

[Verse 2 - Jon Bellion:]
My ex girl, I've been seeing, I've been seeing
I've been seeing lately
She's got hopes that we're getting back together, my God
I just know that I'm horny and I'm lonely, just admit it's crazy
She just holds on to something that she knows is long gone
Damn...

[Pre-Chorus - Jon Bellion:]
I am just a man, I am just a man
Who lusts, gives, tries
Sometimes I lose my way

[Chorus - Jon Bellion:]
Tears at a funeral, tears at a funeral, I might break
Angry at all the things, angry at all the things I can't change
When you're lost in the universe, lost in the universe
Don't lose faith
My mother says, "Your whole life's in the hand of God"

[Post-Chorus - Jon Bellion:]
Break it down
Your whole life's in the hand of
Your whole life's in the hand of God

[Chorus - Sheldon Ray & The Andrae Crouch Choir:]
Tears at a funeral, tears at a funeral, I might break
Angry at all the things, angry at all the things I can't change
When you're lost in the universe, lost in the universe
Don't lose faith
My mother says, "Your whole life's in the hand of God"
Nothing has changed, he is the same
"Your whole life's in the hand of God"
Nothing has changed, he is the same
"Your whole life's in the hand of God"
Nothing has changed, he is the same

[Outro - Sheldon Ray & The Andrae Crouch Choir:]
Bum be-dum, bum bum badum, bum be-dum, bum bum badum
Nothing has changed, he is the same
Bum be-dum, bum bum badum, bum be-dum, bum bum badum
Your whole life's in the hand of God
Tears at a funeral, tears at a funeral, I might break
Angry at all the things, angry at all the things I can't change
When you're lost in the universe, lost in the universe
Don't lose faith
My mother says, "Your whole life's in the hand of God"
Tears at a funeral, tears at a funeral, I might break
Just like the 80s films
We'll hook up in the back seat and let my best friend drive
Nothing has changed, he is the same
Overwhelming
Nothing has changed, he is the same
Overwhelming
Your whole life's in the hand of God
Bring me down in Brooklyn if I lose my life
Nothing has changed, he is the same
Push me down the Hudson and turn on the radio
Nothing has changed, he is the same
Long Island’s only smiling cause my soul is fine
Bum be-dum, bum bum badum, bum be-dum, bum bum badum
Nothing has changed, he is the same
Bum be-dum, bum bum badum
I did everything for New York

Maybe IDK

Page 1149

Maybe you had your reasons.

Maybe you had some problems.

Maybe you got psycho'd by your friends.

Maybe I loved too much.

Maybe you felt suffocated.

Maybe I was too clingy.

Maybe I was too pushy.

Maybe I said something wrong.

Maybe I was a little crazy about you.

Maybe you got scared.

Maybe you found someone better

Maybe i wasnt enough

Maybe...

Maybe...

Maybe idk.

and Maybe that's okay.

Love, Eran.

Current Song Mood: Jon Bellion - Maybe IDK

I wonder why I get paranoid when I’m high
I wonder why I say yes to everyone in my life
I wonder why I can’t run that fast in my dreams
I wonder why I feel short when I know my money’s tall
I wonder why I miss everyone and I still don’t call
I wonder why I can’t run that fast in my dreams

Although I guess if I knew tomorrow
I guess I wouldn’t need faith
I guess if I never fell, I guess I wouldn’t need grace
I guess if I knew His plans, I guess He wouldn’t be God

So maybe I don’t know, maybe I don’t know
Maybe I don’t know, maybe I don’t know
But maybe that’s okay
Maybe that’s okay, maybe that’s okay
Maybe I don’t know, maybe I don’t know
But maybe that’s okay

I wonder why I feel emptiness and I sing these blues
I wonder why I feel hopelessness when I watch the news
I wonder why I can’t find my voice in my dreams
I wonder why they say hate your brother and hide your gold
I wonder why we all fear the things that we might not know
I wonder why I can’t find my voice in my dreams

Although I guess if I knew tomorrow
I guess I wouldn’t need faith
I guess if I never fell, I guess I wouldn’t need grace
I guess if I knew His plans, I guess He wouldn’t be God

So maybe I don’t know, maybe I don’t know
Maybe I don’t know, maybe I don’t know
But maybe that’s okay
Maybe that’s okay, maybe that’s okay
Maybe I don’t know, maybe I don’t know
But maybe that’s okay

All this shit, I can’t explain
Is it by design or random fate, yeah

So maybe I don’t know, maybe I don’t know
Maybe I don’t know, maybe I don’t know
But maybe that’s okay
Maybe that’s okay, maybe that’s okay
Maybe I don’t know, maybe I don’t know
But maybe that’s okay

When The Partys Over

Page 1148

This year.. passed by in a blink of an eye.

What do I see when I close my eyes?

I see... the walls that I spent 3 years building tumbling down as you melted them away with your charm. 

I see... us lying down on the playground, lost in your eyes as the stars flickered above us on that magical night.

I see... my hands in yours as we huddled in the back seat of that double decker. 

I see...my mind breaking down at work, at home, as the anxiety and depression sinked in.

I see... myself waking up in the middle of the night each day. Checking to see if you were online. Writing songs just to distract myself.

I see... myself going on that trip alone that we were so looking forward to.

I see... my close friends telling me to let go and to value myself - and It took a while before I finally found strength to accept that.

Through it all I picked myself up. Time and time again. Thank you, to everyone that was there for me, giving me the advice I knew, but just needed to hear. And this serves as a.. closure before I enter the new year with all the weights off my shoulders. To have space, be light and creatively free. For.. healing.

So what’s next? More workouts, dance classes, film debuts and ORIGINAL music *squeaaals* coming your way soon in 2019. I’ve been hustling non-stop this year. And i won’t stop. I’ll forgive. But I’ll never forget. Inspired by @joshuasimonxl.

Wake me up.. when the party's over.

Love, Eran. ✨

Thank you.

Current Song Mood: Billie Eillish - When The Partys Over

Don't you know I'm no good for you?
I've learned to lose you can't afford to
Tore my shirt to stop you bleeding
But nothing ever stops you leaving

Quiet when I'm coming home and I'm on my own
I could lie, say I like it like that, like it like that
I could lie, say I like it like that, like it like that

Don't you know too much already?
I'll only hurt you if you let me
Call me friend, but keep me closer
(Call me back)
And I'll call you when the party's over

Quiet when I'm coming home and I'm on my own
And I could lie, say I like it like that, like it like that
Yeah, I could lie, say I like it like that, like it like that

But nothing is better, sometimes
Once we've both said our goodbyes
Let's just let it go
Let me let you go

Quiet when I'm coming home and I'm on my own
I could lie, say I like it like that, like it like that
I could lie, say I like it like that, like it like that

Terakhir // Gotta Go My Own Way

Page 1147

Been reminiscing.

It's been...

Exactly 4 months.

4 months since that magical night.

4 months since my life changed.

But I guess.. its all just a dream now.

A bittersweet one.

Two songs that I.. That we... connected over. Heh.

Remember?

When I showed you that brilliant cover of 'Melepaskanmu'? :)

The first time that we met...

You were so blown away.

And Gotta Go My Own Way....

We sang that. One of the many HSM songs we connected over.

I remember a night in the park.

Where you said.

'Damn I can imagine me singing this song when we fight one day.'

Well.. you can sing as much of it as you like now, right? Lol.

:)

I can't deny it.

Even after everything..

You were one of the best highlight of this year.

So for that, I say.. Thank you.

Love, Eran.

Current Song Mood: Sufian Suhaimi - Terakhir

Mengapakah kita selalu berjauh hati
Selalu sendiri dan terasa hati
Apakah kita tak sehaluan lagi

Berat bagiku
Berat bagiku

Apakah salahku
Kau buatku begini
Selalu sendiri
Tinggal sendiri
Cinta yang ku pinta
Kau balas dengan dusta
Berat bagiku
Melepaskanmu
Bukan mudah bagiku untuk melalui semua ini
Pabila kenangan kita mengusik jiwa dan hati
Kala malam tidur ku tak lena mengenangkanmu

Cuba pertahankan
Separuh jiwaku hilang ikut terbang bersamamu
Episod cinta hitamku kini berulang kembali
Berulang kembali menguasai diriku ini

Oh tuhan
Ku mahu yang terbaik
Terbaik buatku
Insan kerdil ini

Oh tuhan
Noktahkan kehilangan ini
Munculkan dia
Dia terakhir buatku

Ooo...
Melepaskanmu
Bukan mudah bagiku untuk melalui semua ini
Pabila kenangan kita mengusik jiwa dan hati
Kala malam tidur ku tak lena mengenangkanmu

Cuba pertahankan
Separuh jiwaku hilang ikut terbang bersamamu
Episod cinta hitamku kini berulang kembali
Berulang kembali menguasai diriku ini

Oh tuhan
Ku mahu yang terbaik
Terbaik buatku
Insan kerdil ini

Oh tuhan
Noktahkan kehilangan ini
Munculkan dia
Dia terakhir buatku
Dan buat dirinya

 Current Song Mood: HSM2 - Gotta Go My Own Way

[Gabriella:]
I gotta say what's on my mind
Something about us doesn't seem right these days
Life keeps getting in the way
Whenever we try, somehow the plan
Is always rearranged

It's so hard to say
But I've gotta do what's best for me
You'll be okay...

I've got to move on and be who I am
I just don't belong here
I hope you understand
We might find our place in this world someday
But at least for now
I gotta go my own way

Don't wanna leave it all behind
But I get my hopes up
And I watch them fall every time
Another color turns to grey
And it's just too hard to watch it all
Slowly fade away
I'm leaving today cause I gotta do what's best for me
You'll be okay...

I've got to move on and be who I am
I just don't belong here
I hope you understand
We might find our place in this world someday
But at least for now
I gotta go my own way

[Troy:]
What about us?
What about everything we've been through?

[Gabriella:]
What about trust?

[Troy:]
You know I never wanted to hurt you

[Gabriella:]
And what about me?

[Troy:]
What am I supposed to do?

[Gabriella:]
I gotta leave but

[Both:]
I'll miss you

[Gabriella (Troy):]
So I've got to move on and be who I am
(Why do you have to go?)
I just don't belong here
I hope you understand
(I'm trying to understand)
We might find our place in this world someday
But at least for now
(I want you to stay)
I gotta go my own way

I've got to move on and be who I am
(What about us?)
I just don't belong here
I hope you understand
(I'm trying to understand)
We might find our place in this world someday
But at least for now
I gotta go my own way
I gotta go my own way
I gotta go my own way

Heal Me

Page 1146

Happy.

Contented.

With all the little things.

Your funny antics.

And your presence.

I could see it.

In your longing eyes.

That you didnt want to leave.

We've talked about this.

That we're not meant for each other.

And yet here we are.

You under my block.

Wanting to spend time with me.

And me....

I'm just happy you're here with me.

Just... in this moment.

Slowly but surely.

You'll heal me.

Love, Eran.

Current Song Mood: Lady Gaga - Heal Me

Treat me like your patient
Just don't keep me waiting
Or I'll just be wasted
In a crowd of the lonely
I need you to inspire me
When I can't inspire myself
I need you to provide for me
When I feel like someone else

Lay me down, lay me down now
Lay me down, touch my spirit, oh
Lay me down, lay me down now
Lay me down

Heal me
God knows nothing else is gonna, gonna heal me
Oh, before it's too late
Won't you steal me?
Steal me all the way from myself
Won't you heal me?
Heal me, ah
Heal me, ah
Heal me, ah

Dose me with your energy
Leave your soul inside of me
Cool me down and calm me
Ring me, don't alarm me

Lay me down, lay me down now
Lay me down, touch my spirit, oh
Lay me down, lay me down now
Lay me down

Heal me
God knows nothing else is gonna, gonna heal me
Oh, before it's too late
Won't you steal me?
Steal me all the way from myself
Won't you heal me?
Heal me, ah
Heal me, ah
Heal me, ah

I wanna be more, or equal, not less
I wanna be happy with someone
I wanna feel blessed
I wanna more, or equal, not less
I wanna be happy with someone
I wanna feel blessed

Heal me
God knows nothing else is gonna, gonna heal me
Oh, before it's too late
Won't you steal me?
Steal me all the way from myself
Won't you heal me?
Heal me, ah
Heal me, ah
Heal me, ah

Imagine

Page 1145

Close your eyes.

And imagine.

Another world.

Imagine a world where it all worked out.

Imagine a world where he didnt leave.

Imagine meeting for the first time.

Imagine falling in love after so long... and thinking..

'Wow I really like him... he's the one.''

Imagine... laying down on the playground floor and looking up to the sky. Counting the stars. Holding hands and making out. Your face fitting so good in my neck. And confessing again: 'Do you wanna be my boyfriend?'

Imagine him... picking you up from work. And you feeling so touched after a long day.

Imagine... Going for all those new movies you've always wanted to go with him. Seating at the end seats just so you could spend some intimate moments together. 

Imagine.. Going for that Batam trip that you planned with him... Exploring. Sight seeing. Massage. Taking pictures. Cuddling in the hotel room, and just.. falling in love all over again with each other. 

Imagine.. planning for more things to do together. More overseas trips... JB, Bangkok... A staycation. Chalets. Wild Wild Wet adventures. Adventure Cove... Jurong Bird Park... Birthday celebrations. Imagine it was all with him instead.

Imagine... him keeping to his promise and bringing you to the altar. The marriage. The happiness and approval from your family and friends.

You both walking down the aisle. And... sharing that beautiful moment. That beautiful kiss.

Imagine him telling you that you're the best he's every had.

Imagine.. all of that.

And what if.. it really did happen.. 

Just not in this life.

Love, Eran.

Current Song Mood: Ariana Grande - Imagine

Step up the two of us, nobody knows us
Get in the car like, "Skrrt"
Staying up all night, order me pad thai
Then we gon' sleep 'til noon
Me with no makeup, you in the bathtub
Bubbles and bubbly, ooh
This is a pleasure, feel like we never
Act this regular

Click, click, click and post
Drip-drip-dripped in gold
Quick, quick, quick, let's go
Kiss me and take off your clothes

Imagine a world like that
Imagine a world like that
We go like up 'til I'm 'sleep on your chest
Love how my face fits so good in your neck
Why can't you imagine a world like that?
Imagine a world

Knew you were perfect, after the first kiss
Took a deep breath like, "Hoo"
Feels like forever, baby, I never
Thought that it would be you
Tell me your secrets, all of the creep shit
That's how I know it's true
Baby, direct it, name in the credits
Like the movies do

Click, click, click and post
Drip-drip-dripped in gold
Quick, quick, quick, let's go
Kiss me and take off your clothes

Imagine a world like that
Imagine a world like that
We go like up 'til I'm 'sleep on your chest
Love how my face fits so good in your neck
Why can't you imagine a world like that?
Imagine a world

Can you imagine it?
Can you imagine it?
Can you imagine it?
Can you imagine it?
Can you imagine it? (Can you imagine?)
Can you imagine it? (Can you imagine?)
Can you imagine it? (Ooh)
Imagine that
Imagine it, imagine it
Imagine it, imagine it
Imagine, imagine
Imagine, imagine
Imagine, imagine

Be Alright

Page 1144

Do I miss it?

Yeah maybe.

Am I over it?

Well maybe.. nah not really.

It feels like..

Nothing.. heals.

So I guess I should just.

Let it go.

It'll be okay.

It'll be alright...

Maybe.. its okay to be broken.

Until someone comes by and picks up the pieces again.

Love, Eran.

Current Song Mood: Dean Lewis - Be Alright

I look up from the ground to see your sad and teary eyes
You look away from me
And I see there's something you're trying to hide, and I
Reach for your hand, but it's cold, you pull away again
And I wonder, what's on your mind?

And then you say to me you made a dumb mistake
You start to tremble and your voice begins to break
You say the cigarettes on the counter weren't your friends, they were my mates
And I feel the color draining from my face

And my friend said
"I know you love her, but it's over, mate
It doesn't matter, put the phone away
It's never easy to walk away
Let her go, it'll be alright"

So I asked to look back at all the messages you'd sent
And I know it wasn't right but it was fucking with my head
And everything deleted like the past, yeah it was gone
And when I touched your face, I could tell you're moving on

But it's not the fact that you kissed him yesterday
It's the feeling of betrayal, that I just can't seem to shake
And everything I know tells me that I should walk away
But I just want to stay

And my friend said

"I know you love her, but it's over, mate
It doesn't matter, put the phone away
It's never easy to walk away
Let her go, it'll be okay
It's gonna hurt for a bit of time
So bottoms up, let's forget tonight
You'll find another and you'll be just fine
Let her go"

Nothing heals
The past like time
And they can't steal
The love you're born to find

But nothing heals
The past like time
And they can't steal
The love you're born to find

"I know you love her, but it's over, mate
It doesn't matter, put the phone away
It's never easy to walk away
Let her go, it'll be okay
It's gonna hurt for a bit of time
So bottoms up, let's forget tonight
You'll find another and you'll be just fine
Let her go"

It'll be alright
It'll be alright
It'll be alright
It'll be alright
It'll be alright

Idontwannabeyouanymore

Page 1143

I guess I'm laughing more now.

Each day.

Surrounding myself with new people.

And just..

Healing.

That's all I've been wanting.

And I guess I slowly am.

You're fading.

And that's a good thing.

You're no good for me.

Today, I passed by your place.

Some nostalgia hit me.

But not as hard as before.

And I guess..

That's a good thing.

I...

Idontwannabeyouanymore.

Love, Eran.

Current Song Mood: Billie Eilish - Idontwannabeyouanymore

Don't be that way
Fall apart twice a day
I just wish you could feel what you say
Show, never tell
But I know you too well
Got a mood that you wish you could sell

If teardrops could be bottled
There'd be swimming pools filled by models
Told "a tight dress is what makes you a whore"
If "I love you" was a promise
Would you break it, if you're honest
Tell the mirror what you know she's heard before
Idontwannabeyouanymore

Hands getting cold
Losing feeling is getting old
Was I made from a broken mold?
Hurt, I can't shake
We've made every mistake
Only you know the way that I break

If teardrops could be bottled
There'd be swimming pools filled by models
Told "a tight dress is what makes you a whore"
If "I love you" was a promise
Would you break it, if you're honest
Tell the mirror what you know she's heard before
I don't wanna be you
I don't wanna be you
I don't wanna be you...
Anymore