Asystole

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Feels... weird.

Usually I’d be excited for birthdays.

But somehow this year, I’m dreading mine.

Is it the fear of growing old creeping up to me? 

I try not to think about it

But you can never really escape it.

Today I had a small celebration for my dad’s birthday. We cut a cake and everyone was so happy and smiling.

Somehow - I wasn’t feeling it.

I did not feel anything inside me.

Like my heart's gone asystole.

Went out in the evening with my partner and just. 

Took a breather.

Sat down by the sea and just, soaked in the moment.

That momentary peace.

That's all I ever want to feel. Peace.

Thank you for spending time with me. It means a lot to me. 

More than you know. 🤍

Love, Eran.

Current Song Mood: Hayley Williams - Asystole

I don't live for you
I live for me
If only that were true
If only I could prove

That on my own I'm worthy, funny how it feels like
We're talking to each other on the other line
But it's quiet here
Nothing playing but the song of Asystole

Asystole
Asystole
Asystole, Asystole

And I can't get my head
To say anything a heart could ever understand

I want to forgive
But the feeling isn't something I can let myself let go of, the trouble is the way you stick
To any part of me that remains in tact
But if I pull the plug
It isn't only me that I'm holding back

Asystole
Asystole
Asystole, Asystole

Revive your love in me
Revive another side of me
My eyes, to see the poisoned devotion in me

Revive, revive, revive Asystole
Asystole