Someone New

Page 384

I know you probably won't even care by now but I need to get this off my chest.

Only God knows how much I've been suffering alone.

I miss you so fucking much.

I miss our cuddles. Our kisses. Our laughter.

The weekly hangouts where I can just chill at your place and escape the reality of stress & family problems.

The times where we can just fall asleep by each other's side.

Cuddling and watching our shows together.

Your funny comments.

Your bitchiness.

Watching you as you slept, thinking about how lucky I was. 

Your snorings that kept me amused.

You grabbing my finger to dig your nose.

You and your sore body and always getting me to massage you.

The countless of times you you'd have to go to the toilet.

The times you'd stalk who i followed on insta and getting annoyed if i followed new people.

The times you knew I was upset and actually bothered to ask what's wrong.

The times we went out together.. Our dates. Town. Changi airport. JB.. Me making time to meet you after work. I was always happy to go on our dates.

Remember that time we kissed in public for the first time? :) That was in the bus. I was so damn shy.

Holding hands in public. Remember that sweet night in town? :)

Chilling/walking around grocery stores for fun and just to kill time. 

I missed your audio notes too. They were so sweet and you seemed to be singing them to me.

 I miss That.

I miss everything about you.

Don't you miss US?

You were my only motivation, to go through internship, work. You influenced me in everything I do. The things I wear. The music I listen to.

Everything I do reminds me of you.

I see green, I think of you.

I go to town, I think of you.

I wear my clothes, I think of you.

I smell my perfume, I think of you.

I listen to songs, I think of you.

Fuck even when I'm taking a dump, i'll think of you.

You're everywhere.

The first time we met.. I was going through a certain phase.. I believe everything happens for a reason.

You were the reason. Deleting all those unnecessary people out of my life was the best thing I ever did.

It felt so therapeutic. I felt good because I had you, and I wanted to focus only on you.

No regrets. I was never so serious & committed to anyone before.

Nowadays silence is all that I get from you. Fine I'm giving you your space. Even though it kills me inside. But Im the one running out of time. You don't even want to see me today. Even if its my last day. Enough of your excuses. I've had enough of all the bullshit really. 

You know what would kill me the most? The thought of someone else in your arms, in your bedroom, receiving the same affection that I did a few months ago.

I've had nightmares… of you with someone new. I was so affected, even when I woke up. It's just a dream yes.. but it feels like the nightmare never stopped. Up until now, I still feel like I'm living in a never ending bad dream.

No matter all the things you did to hurt me, or how bad I've felt… I still want to be with you. Call me a fool or whatever, I don't care. I'm a person who follows my heart strongly. And… I guess the heart wants what it wants.

I want you. 

I Love You.

And I mean that, in the most sincere way possible. 

You've never left my mind.. Every single moment.

So please..

Please wait for me.

Please don't fall in love with someone new.

I promise I'll come back for you.

And I hope by then, we'll both have enough time and space to grow into better individuals.

...

So I guess this is it.

My dear.

You'll forever have a special place in my heart.

Till we meet again. 

<3

Goodbye.

Love, Eran.

I promise.

Current Song Mood: BANKS - Someone New

[Verse 1:]
I can love you desperately, though your love ain't guaranteed
Oh, I wish you knew the deal, gotta learn from far away
And I simply needed space, space for me to be
And I think you need it too
Though I know you call me selfish for assuming
I did this for you too, you still got me around your finger
Even though I'm far away
Please believe me when I say

[Chorus:]
Everything I do, I'm gonna think of you
Don't know what else to do
You got me, you got me, baby
Everything I make, I only make for you
Baby, be patient for me
And please don't fall in love with someone new
I promise one day I'll come back for you

[Verse 2:]
Oh, you say you hate me now, and you burn me with your words
Calling me a fool, saying that I've fucked up everything
And you'll never forgive me, though I'm doing this for you
Baby, can't you see if there is such a thing
Of loving someone so much that you need
To give them time to let them breathe
But you don't understand, I wish you understood
Oh, I hope one day you do

[Chorus]

[Bridge:]
Believe in you, believe in me, we're meant to be together
I told you, weren't lyin', I know you aren't relying
And now I am supplying you the time and space
To let you grow into the person that I know, that I know you can be
And I can be one too
And I'll come back to you
And I am ready for you, baby, I am ready for you now
I'm not ready for you now, please don't hate me

[Chorus]

[Outro:]
I promise one day I'll come back to you
I promise one day I'll come back to you
I promise baby, one day I'll come back to you
I promise baby, one day I'll come back to you